Memory Time Machine.

By nature, the future is unknown, but also exciting and scary. Unknown, because, well it’s the future, exciting because the future is a blank page of possibilities and scary because the future is a blank page of possibilities.

But the future is also a lot more predictable than we give it credit for. I realized this after some good ol’ reminiscing. Thinking back to how I used to play, what I used to love, and how I grew up – those experiences became patterns that gave me a sneak peak into my future.

As a little girl my days were consumed in the world of Barbies and dolls, spending hours living the lives of skinny, blonde plastic dolls. Teddy bears were a close second, creating a school where they would go every day. As I grew older, the idea of living out different lives still captured my imagination and when friends came over, we would play ‘teacher teacher’ or ‘teenager teenager’ (the repetition of the name obviously made it a game).

Looking back at my childhood, it was obvious that I would become a writer. My love for escaping into different worlds, for creating new worlds, for stories and storytelling was found as I bossed Ken around and filled Barbie’s life with a new career every day. Looking back, my need for control was also clear in those early years, as I controlled the fate of those fictional characters with far too much joy. 

It’s obvious that your past shapes your future, but instead of just letting life happen to us, we can use our past, our now, and shape it with intention. We can look critically at what we like about ourselves and what we don’t; we don’t have to be the same person forever. We can look back at who we were, look at who we are and decide who we want to be. 

We’re not victims of the future but victors.


The pursuit of perfection.

My boss gets hung up on words, copywriter by profession – being a stickler for words is part of the job, but if he doesn’t like just one word, he doesn’t like the piece of work. It used to drive me mad, I mean it’s one word! But then I realised it wasn’t one word; it was the pursuit of perfection.

 There are 26 letters in the alphabet, and out of those 26 letters, there are more than 171,476 words in the English dictionary. And that’s just English. As language evolves new words are added, and old words retired. It’s pretty magical that just 26 letters have written 129,864,880 books and novels. Think of all the blogs, Facebook statuses, twitter posts. Think of the letters written to long lost lovers, breakup texts and booty call messages. Think of the laws, policies, constitutions – the history made with just those 26 letters.  

 Seeing the world through a set of letters made me realise that writing is an art form, that one shouldn’t carelessly throw some words together but consider them. One’s head should be stuck in a dictionary, searching for synonyms and perfection.

 Seeing the world through a set of letters made me realise that perfection, however impossible to attain, is in the detail. It’s in the ‘ah that’s so small, nobody will notice’ moments, not just for writers but for everyone. For plumbers, police, lawyers and cooks – whatever your chosen profession is, see it as an art form, see the detail. 

It’s the little things.

 Life, when you look at it in it’s entirety, can be pretty daunting. How life should be, the ideals that should be kept, the future, the bigger picture – well it’s all pretty big. Big and daunting.

 I shrug my shoulders in the present and shake my head at the future. Anxious that things will never be quite right. Not right in my life, not right in the world.

The future seems overwhelming when you look at what you want out if it. A better, brighter future always seems far away. So the best way to digest life, is not to swallow it whole but cut it into tiny little pieces.

I am under the belief that the horrible big social problems and issues that seem to block a clear and happy future for all should not be looked at with dismay. We should instead look at what we are capable of doing every day. Whether it’s picking up litter or smiling at a passing pedestrian. Being consistent with the small things, makes taking on the big things a bit more bearable.

So in the grand big cruel scheme of life, it’s the little things. The lists and the small milestones – they count because that’s our ride to the future, our own time machine if you must.

Don’t let anyone steal your sunshine.

It sometimes feels like the world is a gigantic vacuum cleaner and we are the lost buttons and fluff found on the carpet, and we just get sucked up, in a flash, boom, done. I mean one minute we’re a happy piece of fluff just fluffing around, the next second we’re living in a dust covered world that looks like something out of ‘Stranger Things’.

Society, people; they have a way of turning your day upside down, not just your day but your smile too. One day you’ve woken up on the right side of the bed and next minute it feels like someone just pushed you off it.

Here’s the truth, the world is harsh, people aren’t always going to like you or to be kind to you. But you have the choice to be better. It’s your choice to face blue days with sunny smiles.

Be better. Be nice. Be happy. Keep on spreading sunshine. Your sunshine is yours, don’t let anyone dull it. Don’t let anyone make you feel silly or worthless. Don’t let anyone darken your day. When you smile through a storm, the storm has no power to scare you.

Don’t let anyone steal your sunshine.

Do not fear boredom.

I remember rushing home from school, flinging my school shoes off and collapsing onto my bed. Staring at the ceiling for what seemed five minutes, and dreaming up some unrealistically splendid thoughts and scenarios; being married to Zac Efron, being able to pause time, being a spy, a singer, all those great things. Those five minutes were actually two hours and the sun would be setting on a pale candy floss lit sky.

Lying on my bed, floating in the pool, sitting on the grass; I would travel to Russia, I would meet new people, try new things. I would daydream up a life that one day I would hopefully live, or daydream up a life that I would never be able to live.

Now trying to remembering the last time I just did nothing, well I wouldn’t be able to tell you.

Work. Instagram. Work. Facebook. Work. Eat. Some new ‘have to watch series’. Sleep. Pub. Club. Coffee date. Maybe run. Probably not run. Some new ‘have to watch series’. Pinterest. Side hustle. Repeat.

If I were to do an audit of my life, the results would come back as busy, boarding on cluttered. Cluttered with things and stuff and this and that. Just. So. Much. Stuff. I call it stuff because I don’t really know what ‘it’ is. It’s a miscellaneous category. This miscellaneous category is born out of a fear to be bored, afraid to be lazy, afraid of wasting time, not building my career, or making new friends.

I miss daydreaming, living slowly and simply, being content. Daydreaming is actually conducive to creativity. To be still is good for you. Good for your brain, your relationships, your career. I obviously found this out because I was bored, so went on an obsessive  Googling spree, but the point is I arrived at a great webpage and a great place, and a great thought that got me thinking. That got me daydreaming, that got me embracing boredom. Boredom isn’t just boredom, it’s a state of being still, a healthy pause. It’s something that we’ve redefined as bad but I think we need more boredom.

Stop filling up your mind with stuff, give it space, let it wander.

Summer Day Optimism

A blue sky, a clear slate, a brighter day, a brighter hue. A sense of adventure captured from a ray of warm sun. When Miss.Fitzgerald serenaded us with Summertime Livin’, she was right, in summer the living is easy. There’s just something to be said about dresses, sandals and pool soaking days. A sense of freedom from your mind to your feet, Mother Nature’s treat.

Thou shalt not covert thou ideas  

‘I thought of it first.’
‘They stole my idea.’
If I have learnt anything in the past few years, it is that there is no such thing as a unique or original thought. There’s a reason why similar ideas are forever popping up. Now I do not pretend to know the exact reason why that is, I won’t even pretend to baffle you with theories, scientific or anthropologic that would explain it, but I do have my own beliefs.
I believe that every thought that is thought is put into the universe, available for anyone’s mind to wander upon. It’s a first come, first serve scenario. And instead of running a competitive creative race, why don’t we put our thoughts together and make something bigger than ourselves?
The first step? Don’t be precious about your ideas.
The second step? Don’t be a douche.
With those steps covered, I think we’d be closer to a more progressive and innovative society. If we became more obsessed with moving forwards, as opposed to getting there first, I think perhaps we’d be moving closer to that ‘world peace’ thing pageant winners are forever going on about.
Let’s be ‘creative communists’, sharing thoughts and ideas. Collectively moving towards a common goal. Let’s tear down creative capitalism, that will by nature always serve people’s agendas instead of people’s needs. 

He always stared.

Obsessedvia Daily Prompt: Obsessed

He always stared and stared and stared, never blinking, always watching. From side to side his eyes darted and danced with a certain rhythmic jive.

He loved to look and look and look but looking was not all he loved. He loved eyes, for they were the tools to look, and looking did he love.

Blue, green, brown he loved them all, so much so that he had to have them all.

One day he bought a jar, well maybe two or three. He also bought a metal spoon, so shiny, so round, so cold.

It was time to visit Mary Sue, he thought, the girl with big blue eyes. Well visit is a vague term to describe climbing through her window. He found her sleeping and woke her up, and her eyes grew so big. This made him smile, this made her scream.

So he grabbed his spoon.

An ode to the girl who never gave up.

 To the girl who never gave up, here’s to you;

For getting up, moving on and dusting your knees.

For running when they said you couldn’t walk,

For talking when they said it was not your place,

even when they took your voice from you; you never stopped.

For tearing up the piece of paper that said you were nothing,

using it to start a fire and set the world aflame

and rebuilding, till the world was yours.

For looking gender in the eye and questioning it,

For telling stereotypes they could shove it,

and for choosing pink, choosing blue, choosing you.

For giving life, for being strong, for being so many things.

For your beautiful soul, your loving eyes, your tender touch,

and your essence which can’t measured by a number or a substance or a chemical;

whose roots run so deep and so wide that you are the wind, rain

and everything inbetween.

You support and hold generations in your hands,

and lead armies with them too.

You are always underestimated

but don’t let that stop you,

Never give up. 

Do not let fear win.

In the uncertainty of the future, the uncertainty of what may come; never lose your sense of adventure. Take hold of today and live it well, because tomorrow is another day and it can be handled then, that’s not to say you shouldn’t pack a rucksack full of wisdom and bandaids. Look at tomorrow, and what it might hold and smile; take on that adventure; choose hope. Don’t look at the horizon and expect storm clouds, see a clear sky. I guess I am talking in overused and cheesy metaphors because I look around and all I see is hate and fear. I see world changing decisions being made by people who choose fear rather than hope, who make these world changing decisions from a place of anxiety and doubt. Decisions made from that place are not clear headed,  objective or productive. Fear based decisions lead to further fear which turns into hate. These decisions bring out the worst in humanity, they reveal this horrible dementor-like soul sucking hooded villain, that is blinded by an innate desire to control everything. Don’t try to control the future, rather embrace change and avoid taking up a job as a prison guard at Azkaban.